How To Deal With People Who Put You Down: 13-Step Guide

This new article will show you everything you need to know about how to deal with people who put you down.

When someone throws triggers at you or insults you, it is not a pleasant experience. When someone criticizes you, makes fun of you, or humiliates you, it can hurt your feelings.

You can deal with those who demean you in such a way that they stop and leave you alone. You just need to learn to take care of yourself and know what to do when something goes wrong.

How To Deal With People Who Put You Down:

1. Don’t react too quickly.

Dealing with it is all about not retaliating right away when someone depresses you. A quick retort or rage will only reinforce his behavior. It will provide him with what he craves: a response from you.

Also, acting under the influence of anger or other negative emotions is not good for you. You may do or say something you will regret, or you may suffer from stress.

Take a few deep breaths. This will help you maintain your composure. Slowly count to five while staying calm.

2. Don’t respond in any way.

You may feel compelled to respond with an angry remark of your own, but this will make you seem as petty as she is. This will only add to the tension and not resolve the situation.

Retaliation, like a quick response, gets her what she wants.

Even if you want to, don’t respond to unpleasant comments and online posts with cruel remarks and posts of your own.

Later, don’t start rumors about her. It may make you feel great at the time, but it doesn’t solve the problem.

3. Don’t pay attention.

Sometimes silence is the most effective weapon.

Ignoring someone who criticizes you deprives them of the pleasure of receiving a response from you. It prevents you from wasting time and energy on someone who doesn’t deserve your attention. Moreover, her bad behavior will contrast sharply with your positive behavior.

Just pretend that she didn’t say anything. Continue doing what you were doing without looking at her.

If you ignore this person, unless she is very thick-skinned, she will usually leave you alone.

4. Tell the other person to stop.

This is a direct way to tell the person that you don’t want him to humiliate you anymore. Ignoring the problem directly can help resolve the issue if ignoring it hasn’t worked or if the situation is really annoying or upsetting.

Make sure you are in a good mood. Look him in the eye and speak in a calm, confident, and direct manner.

For example, if someone insults you, take a few long breaths and calmly say, “Stop humiliating me.”

You can say to a co-worker: “I don’t like or dislike the way you talk to me or about me.” I wish you would stop criticizing me. “

If this is a colleague who doesn’t want to be cruel, you can say, “I know you didn’t mean to hurt my emotions, but what you said hurt my feelings.” Please don’t make fun of me that way. “

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5. Identify why the person is behaving this way.

People who demean others do so for a variety of reasons. It is not always done on purpose and it is not always intended to hurt you. Understanding the person’s motivation can help you decide how to address it.

Some people do this out of insecurity or jealousy. They are trying to make themselves feel better by humiliating you.

Some people do it to impress others or get attention. Others are unaware of their actions or simply fail to communicate appropriately.

People are not always trying to be cruel or hurt your emotions. They may recognize it as innocent banter.

6. Establish boundaries

Some comments are simply disgusting and you should ignore them. Other statements are genuinely unpleasant and insensitive and should be addressed. Determining where that line is can help you figure out how to respond to a given scenario.

For example, when your brother teases you in some way, it can be annoying. However, you know that he doesn’t mean it seriously and isn’t trying to hurt your emotions. You may not even want to broach the subject with him until things get out of hand.

However, a co-worker who consistently makes derogatory statements against you will definitely need to be addressed.

Such a person has crossed a line and should be reported to a supervisor if the remarks are discriminatory or occur too frequently.

7. Maintain open lines of communication with your coworkers and peers.

People who demean you, even if they don’t know you well, are usually doing it for the wrong reason (or may just be annoying). Don’t make a ruckus, but let them know that it’s unacceptable.

If at all possible, have the discussion in private. This will reduce her desire to “show up” to other people while maintaining your mutual respect.

“During the conversation, you made some unpleasant comments about my concept,” you might say. I welcome constructive criticism, but not name-calling. Please don’t make that mistake again. “

Stop talking to her if she starts demeaning you while you are trying to talk to her about it. You may need to report this behavior if it continues or gets worse.

8. Be firm with siblings and friends.

Although it may start as innocent teasing, it can escalate quickly and you need to get the offender to stop. When you urge her to stop, don’t laugh or hurl insults at her.

The insults will continue because she will not take you seriously. When you urge her to stop, be firm and use a calm, clear voice.

9. Be respectful of your superiors.

Sometimes, without realizing it, our parents, professors, or bosses put us down (1). Make it clear to these people that their insults bother you and that you want them to stop.

This warns the person not to do it again, as well as signals your feelings about it. This is also an important first step in dealing with the problem in the long run.

Check with your company’s human resources department on how to handle criticism from supervisors.

If it doesn’t make you uncomfortable, have a one-on-one conversation with him or her. This will make the conversation less uncomfortable for both of you.

Try saying, “It honestly bothers me when you call my job ridiculous.” “I know I don’t always get everything done, but don’t call me lazy,” for example. That offends my sensibilities. “

If you don’t feel comfortable talking to him or her one-on-one or if you think he or she is intentionally demeaning you, tell another trusted adult or HR.

SEE ALSO: How To Attract Friends Into Your Life: (20 Most Insightful Tips)

10. Don’t take it personally. The other person’s comments are a reflection of her, not you.

If she were a happy person, she wouldn’t spend so much time bringing other people down. She probably does this to other people as well, not just you.

If you give in to her insults, she wins. Letting what she says destroy your self-esteem or make you feel terrible in your own skin is not a good idea.

Make a list of all your positive qualities to remind yourself of all your good qualities (2).

Make a note of what she said about you. For each one, write three things that show it is not true. Make a list of all the compliments you have received from others.

11. Make use of stress-reduction techniques.

It can be frustrating to be humiliated by others, especially if it happens often. To deal with the person who is nagging you and the stress it causes you, learn and use some stress-reduction strategies.

When that person is around, use deep breathing and meditation to help yourself stay calm.

Mindfulness can help you cope with stress and may even allow you to calm down when dealing with someone who is bothering you.

To relieve stress, try doing something physical, such as running or swimming.

12. Seek professional assistance.

If someone constantly humiliates you or is really cruel, you should tell them and get help. If the person doing this is an authority figure, such as a teacher, parent, or boss, tell someone.

Using support systems is beneficial in many ways. They can advocate for you and even report what is happening when it happens.

Tell someone you can trust about what is happening. Give her as much information as possible so she can understand the problem. Ask for help in dealing with the person who is putting you down.

This can be as simple as asking a buddy to accompany you when you ask someone to stop.

It may mean reporting this person to the appropriate authorities.

13. Surround yourself with people who are optimistic.

Spending time with positive people can help you cope with the stress of having someone knock you down. It also helps you take care of yourself on a more general level. Being with positive people can help you feel less stressed. It can distract you from the person who let you down and how that made you feel.

Regularly try to connect and talk to people who give you encouragement.

Do something fun instead of just talking about the person who is dragging you down.

I want to thank you for taking the time to read my article about how to deal with people who put you down. I sincerely hope its contents have been a good help to you.

Przemkas Mosky
Przemkas Mosky started Perfect 24 Hours in 2017. He is a Personal Productivity Specialist, blogger and entrepreneur. He also works as a coach assisting people to increase their motivation, social skills or leadership abilities. Read more here