If you want to know how to be respected by others, you’ll love this article.
Have you ever wondered why some people are more liked and respected than others? Or maybe you struggle with relationships and don’t know why? Find out how to gain the sympathy, respect, and recognition of others.
Here are some simple and proven ways to earn the sympathy, respect, and recognition of those around you.
How To Be Respected By Others:
1. Smile
If you want people to like you more, try to smile at them as often as possible.
I still remember two girls from my high school who were in a parallel class. They were completely different from each other. One was very serious for her age, rarely smiled, and thought that wearing branded clothes would earn her the admiration of her classmates. The effect was quite the opposite—few people wanted to be around her, and she was perceived as someone who looked down on others.
The other girl, on the other hand, always had a sincere smile and radiated positive energy. She didn’t come from a wealthy family, and sometimes you could notice small imperfections in her outfit, but it never bothered her. People were naturally drawn to her, like bees to honey. That’s when I realized that what we wear on our faces is far more valuable than what we wear on our bodies.
Think about this the next time you see someone dressed elegantly but with a scowl on their face. Does that person seem likable at first glance? Yes? No? Why? Now, compare that with a childhood memory or an imagined scene—a child laughing and playing in a puddle, splashing dirty water, covered in mud from head to toe. Doesn’t their joy and smile instantly bring a sense of warmth? It’s the same with how others perceive you. First, they see your face, and from your expression, they immediately form an opinion about you.
A smile conveys far more information than a grim expression. A genuine smile shows openness, kindness, and a willingness to engage in conversation or cooperation. It builds your positive image right from the start—both among those who already know you and those who haven’t had the chance to meet you yet.
The power of a smile is immense, even when no one sees you doing it. You can test this for yourself the next time you answer a call from a friend. Smile while talking, and within moments, you’ll hear how your conversation partner reciprocates that smile in their voice.
But what if you don’t feel like smiling? It’s simple—force yourself to do it, and soon your mood will improve. People are as happy as they believe themselves to be. A daily habit of smiling is a guaranteed way to boost your personal brand and significantly increase your likability.
2. Show Genuine Interest in People
You’ve probably had conversations with friends or acquaintances who use their phone while talking to you. How does that make you feel? Exactly. Personally, in such situations, I feel uncomfortable and start wondering if I’m bothering the other person. Technological advancements increasingly shape our lives and communication, but is it really appropriate to use a smartphone during a conversation? I know people who not only find it rude but even offensive. This is definitely not a good way to win people over— even if they say they don’t mind, they actually do.
Another example is a friend of mine who, whenever he meets someone new or speaks to a larger audience, feels the need to list all his titles and positions. Most people couldn’t care less—in fact, it often annoys them, and they perceive him as someone with an inflated ego. They would much rather get to know him through the projects he works on—those that have a real impact on them or their loved ones. This is not the best way to gain respect and likability from others.
When you meet someone new…
So how should you act when meeting someone new? A useful approach is the principle of reciprocity, often applied at business networking events where entrepreneurs gather. It’s based on showing genuine interest in what the other person does daily. This has a double benefit: not only do you learn about your conversation partner’s profession, but after introducing yourself, there’s a high chance they’ll ask you the same question. And it doesn’t matter whether they do it out of curiosity or simple politeness—what matters is that the connection you establish in those few minutes could turn into something more than just a casual chat.
And if your conversation partner doesn’t show interest in you? Well, that’s valuable information too.
When you meet a friend…
Whenever you meet a friend, it’s always worth asking, “What’s good with you?” I deliberately phrased it this way—focusing only on positive topics. Some people enjoy complaining, criticizing, or talking about how terrible the world is. Hopefully, you’re not one of them. But if you are, stop doing it if you want people to like you.
People generally dislike three types of individuals: chronic complainers, constant critics, and those who boast about their achievements. If you tend to do any of these excessively, it’s time to stop. Instead of burdening others with your problems, take a moment to reflect on why you do it and how you can change. This kind of behavior, especially when meeting new people, can push them away before they even get to know you.
At the end of the day, showing genuine interest in others can help you gain more friends in a few weeks than trying to make others interested in you over a lifetime. A person who doesn’t care about others will struggle in life and face frequent setbacks. Show enthusiasm when you meet someone or answer their call, and the conversation will immediately become more pleasant.
We are naturally drawn to those who show interest in us. So, if you want people to like you, make sure to express friendship and genuine curiosity about them from the very beginning.
3. Encourage Your Conversation Partner to Talk About Themselves
If you avoid interrupting and listen carefully to your conversation partner, you’re giving them the greatest compliment. Focus on remembering the conversation, ask follow-up questions, and offer sincere compliments from time to time. If you do this, you will surely win their sympathy.
People prefer good listeners over good speakers. Often, they just need someone to share their thoughts and problems with—it’s a way of relieving an emotional burden, which can be more valuable to them than the conversation itself. So, don’t dominate the discussion, or you risk coming across as dull. And let’s be honest—nobody likes a bore.
3. Talk About Things That Matter to Your Conversation Partner
If you want to build a strong connection with someone, start discussing topics that are important to them. You don’t have to be an expert—just listen attentively and ask questions. There are a few universal questions that work particularly well in mentor-student or employer-employee relationships:
- Where and what did you study?
- How did your company get started?
- What do you enjoy doing in your free time?
People we view as wiser or as authority figures love to talk about their experiences. Most of the time, it’s not about vanity—it’s a genuine desire to share knowledge and lessons learned.
Imagine starting college or a new job where you don’t know anyone. A great way to build strong relationships is by encouraging people to talk about themselves and their interests, such as their hobbies or favorite sports.
4. Make People Feel Important
Some time ago, I was driving to a friend’s house, passing through a small town, when I noticed an elderly man standing at a pedestrian crossing. He was holding his bicycle, waiting to cross the street. There were no other vehicles in sight, and he could have easily crossed after I drove by, but I decided to stop for him. To my surprise, the old man paused, removed his cap, bowed deeply, and waved in gratitude. With this simple act, I made him feel important for that brief moment, and he wanted to return the kindness. A small gesture, yet one I will remember for the rest of my life. It lifted my mood so much that I recorded a short video for my friends about the power of small acts of kindness. Such moments can create beautiful stories and bring a wonderful energy that lasts all day.
Another time, I was having lunch with a friend at a small diner. We both ordered the daily special, which included soup and a main course. I wasn’t too convinced about the soup, but the woman taking our order assured me it was very good. I took her word for it, and soon, our meals arrived. One spoonful, then another… and I realized that this soup tasted nothing like the ones I had as a child—it was even better! My friend also enjoyed it.
After finishing our meals and returning our trays, we were about to leave. The diner had become much busier, and we were glad we had arrived earlier. As we were heading out, I did something I don’t usually do. I asked the cashier to pass on a message to the cook: that it was the best cabbage soup I had ever eaten. The woman’s face lit up with a big smile, and she proudly responded, “That’s my work!” It was the least I could do to show my appreciation for such a delicious meal. It cost me nothing, yet it made her feel valued and important. I suspect it meant even more to her because I expressed my appreciation in front of her colleagues, supervisors, and other customers.
Ever since that day, every time I return to that diner, she greets me warmly with a bright smile, sometimes even recommending the best dishes. That simple moment of recognition created a lasting connection.
People’s Reactions
I have many similar stories, and I’ve heard even more from others. What’s fascinating is how people react when they are appreciated. Many respond with a grateful smile. Some nearby observers smile too, while others remain indifferent, and a few seem genuinely surprised, as if kindness in public were something unusual.
Think about what you admire in others and how you can brighten their day. Remember, every person is equally important—show them that you see and appreciate their worth. You can send a little ray of sunshine to someone without expecting anything in return. Compliment a cashier on her beautiful hair, tell your aunt her car looks great, or praise a waiter’s charming smile. These small gestures cost nothing but can transform the atmosphere into something much warmer and more welcoming. By spreading tiny sparks of kindness, you make the world a better place.
5. Address People by Their Name
Remember that for every person, their name (or surname) is the most important word in the world. Remembering and using it allows you to compliment your conversation partner in a subtle yet highly effective way. However, forgetting or mispronouncing it can put you in an awkward and unpleasant situation. People take great pride in their names and often want them to be remembered. By making an effort to recall and use someone’s name, you show them how important they are to you.
Napoleon III understood this well. He proudly claimed that, despite his royal duties, he could remember the surname of every person he met. He used a special technique for this. If someone introduced themselves unclearly, he would ask them to repeat their name. If it sounded foreign, he would inquire about its spelling. During the conversation, he made sure to repeat the name several times and associate it with the person’s character, behavior, or appearance. If the person was particularly important, he took even greater care—writing the name down later in private, focusing on its pronunciation and spelling to ensure he remembered it. As Ralph Waldo Emerson once said:
“Good manners consist of small sacrifices.”
Your name or surname sets you apart from others. A request or message gains special significance when we add the recipient’s name—whether they are a waiter or a CEO.
Example:
“I ordered fries, not potatoes.”
“Ms. Patricia, I ordered fries, not potatoes.”
While discussing this final method to become more likable, I feel obligated to mention one more important thing—the use of three magic words: Thank you, Sorry, and Please. Such simple words, yet they make a huge difference. Start using them today, and you’ll see why I called them magical.
See how you can strengthen the example above:
“I’m very sorry. Ms. Patricia, I ordered fries, not potatoes. Please exchange them. Thank you.”
When meeting someone new, it’s also a good idea to ask how they prefer to be addressed—simply, what they like best and what others call them.
Example:
- Not every Anna likes being called “Annie”; some may prefer “Anne.”
- Personally, I prefer being called Gregory rather than Greggy.
A useful technique for remembering names is to associate them with people you already know or with adjectives that start with the same letter. For example:
- Ambitious Annie
- Charming Charles
- Eloquent Eleanor
- Mini Mark
I use this method in training sessions, where I can remember over a dozen names in just a few minutes.
Final Thought:
Remember, a person’s own name is the sweetest and most important word in the world to them. If you want to gain people’s affection, learn to remember their names quickly.
Which of these methods do you like the most? Leave a comment explaining why!
Share this article with someone who might need it. Thanks to you, they may gain valuable insights that help them rethink their behavior and improve their relationships. And who knows—you might earn their lifelong gratitude!
