How To Read Body Language To Avoid Misunderstandings

How To Read Body Language And Facial Expressions
How To Read Body Language And Facial Expressions

This article has everything you need to know about how to read body language and facial expression.

Reading body language is like listening to a second, silent conversation happening alongside the words people say. It can give you hints about someone’s emotions, intentions, or state of mind—even when their words suggest something different. Being able to interpret these signals can strengthen relationships, help you avoid misunderstandings, and give you a deeper sense of connection with others.

How To Read Body Language To Avoid Misunderstandings

1. Notice someone’s baseline behavior.

Every person has patterns that make up their “normal.” When you spend time with someone, you start to recognize how they usually sit, talk, or move. If their behavior suddenly changes, that shift often means something.

Imagine your coworker, who normally jokes around during lunch breaks, sitting silently and pushing their food around. That change might mean they’re stressed or upset. Or consider a friend who usually slouches in their chair but suddenly sits up straight, leaning in whenever you speak—that shift may show they’re unusually engaged in what you’re saying.

2. Remember that body language depends on context.

It’s tempting to think that certain cues mean the same thing everywhere, but culture, personality, and individual differences matter. In some cultures, direct eye contact is considered respectful, while in others it can be seen as rude or aggressive. Likewise, someone who avoids eye contact isn’t always hiding something—they may just be shy, tired, or neurodivergent.

For example, an autistic person might avoid eye contact simply because it feels overwhelming, not because they’re being dishonest. The key is to avoid jumping to conclusions and instead focus on the person as a whole.

3. Look for patterns, not isolated signals.

One gesture or expression alone rarely tells the whole story. A person crossing their arms might just be cold, not defensive. A yawn could mean boredom, but it could just as easily mean they didn’t sleep well the night before. The more cues you gather, the clearer the picture becomes.

If you suspect someone isn’t telling the truth, watch their overall behavior rather than seizing on a single clue. People can fidget or avoid eye contact for countless reasons that have nothing to do with lying.

4. Ask instead of assuming.

Sometimes the best way to “read” someone is simply to check in. People often appreciate when someone notices they’re not quite themselves. Asking gently can show care and create space for honesty.

You might say:

  • “You seem quieter than usual—everything okay?”
  • “I notice you keep shifting in your seat. Is this chair uncomfortable?”
  • “You looked distracted during the meeting. Do you have something else on your mind?”
    Such questions not only help you avoid misinterpretation but can also deepen your relationship by showing you’re paying attention.

5. Watch where the eyes go.

Our eyes often follow what matters to us. Someone who maintains steady eye contact is usually focused on you, while someone repeatedly glancing at the door might be eager to leave. In a group, if a person consistently looks at one particular individual, it can signal admiration, tension, or interest.

Looking down might show nervousness, while staring into space could suggest disinterest or fatigue. But again, context is everything. A neurodivergent person, for example, might look away or appear distracted as a way of regulating sensory input rather than signaling disconnection. That’s why it’s always best to combine eye movements with other cues before forming conclusions.

6. Eye contact

Eye contact is one of the most powerful nonverbal cues, but its meaning can shift depending on culture, personality, and situation. Some people are naturally comfortable holding steady eye contact, while others find it overwhelming or unnecessary. What really matters is noticing patterns—what’s typical for the person you’re observing—and how that compares to what you’re seeing in the moment.

When someone locks eyes with you intensely, it doesn’t always mean honesty or confidence. In fact, liars sometimes overcompensate with too much eye contact because they’ve learned that looking away makes them seem suspicious. Likewise, someone socially anxious might overdo eye contact because they’re trying hard to “get it right,” not because they feel relaxed.

Steady, balanced eye contact usually signals attention and engagement. A friend leaning forward and keeping eye contact while you tell a story is likely enjoying both your company and the conversation. Sometimes this kind of focus can even suggest romantic interest, especially when paired with other positive signals like smiling or mirroring your gestures.

Little or no eye contact can mean a lot of things: shyness, discomfort, cultural differences, or even fatigue. For instance, a student avoiding the teacher’s gaze might not be guilty of slacking off but simply nervous about being called on. In social settings, low eye contact might be a hint that the person would feel more at ease if you adjusted the environment—moving somewhere quieter, softening your tone, or simply reassuring them.

7. Raised eyebrows

Eyebrows can be surprisingly expressive, often giving away emotions before words do. Raised eyebrows usually signal a kind of heightened reaction: surprise, worry, or curiosity. If a coworker raises their eyebrows while you explain a new idea, they may be intrigued and want to hear more. On the other hand, the same gesture paired with a tight smile could mean they’re skeptical or uncomfortable.

Sometimes, raised eyebrows accompany insincere remarks. If someone compliments your haircut but their eyebrows are arched in a way that doesn’t match a genuine smile, it might mean they’re just being polite rather than honest. Raised eyebrows in rapid flashes can also act as a subtle greeting signal—something you’ll notice often in passing interactions.

8. Crow’s feet

When people smile authentically, the muscles around their eyes engage, creating little crinkles at the corners, often called crow’s feet. These are a reliable sign of a genuine smile because they’re hard to fake on command. Think about looking at a school yearbook photo where half the kids are smiling stiffly—their mouths are smiling, but their eyes give away that it isn’t real.

Crow’s feet show up when someone is truly amused, happy, or warmly connected. For example, during a heartfelt conversation, a friend’s whole face lights up with a smile, complete with crow’s feet—that’s a moment of genuine emotion you can trust.

9. Clenched jaw and furrowed brow

Stress and tension often reveal themselves in the face, especially through the jaw and forehead. A tight jaw, combined with a furrowed brow, often points to frustration, worry, or hidden pressure. You might notice this in a colleague who says they’re “fine” but clenches their teeth while agreeing to take on an extra project. Their body language is betraying how they truly feel.

This tension often spreads to the neck and shoulders. People under strain may rub the back of their neck or stretch their shoulders unconsciously, trying to release the pressure. If you pick up on this, it’s a good chance to offer empathy, support, or even to renegotiate what you’re asking of them.

10. Grimacing

A grimace is a fleeting tightening of the mouth, often pulling back slightly as if the person just tasted something sour. It’s an involuntary signal that usually reveals discomfort, fear, or unease. Because grimaces are often microexpressions—brief and difficult to control—they can reveal feelings people are trying to hide.

For example, if a friend grimaces while agreeing to your suggestion to meet at a noisy bar, they may not actually want to go but don’t know how to say it outright. Similarly, during a conversation, if someone grimaces right before insisting they’re “telling the truth,” it could be a sign they’re withholding something or feeling conflicted.

11. Crossed arms and legs

When someone crosses their arms or legs during a conversation, it can sometimes suggest they’re putting up a barrier—whether emotional, mental, or even physical. It’s a classic signal of feeling guarded, resistant, or uneasy. In a negotiation, for example, if the other party folds their arms while you’re presenting your offer, it could mean they’re not convinced or they’re protecting their stance. Similarly, in a group discussion, a participant sitting back with arms and legs tightly crossed might be signaling that they’re skeptical or disengaged.

That said, not every crossed arm or leg is a red flag. People also fold their arms when they’re cold, or cross their legs simply out of comfort. That’s why it’s important to pay attention to the whole picture. If someone is smiling, nodding, and actively contributing, their crossed arms probably mean nothing more than a comfortable posture.

12. Pointing

Where someone points—or even subtly angles their gestures—can give clues about their focus and social alignment. People often gesture toward those they feel connected to or want others to notice. In a business meeting, if the speaker consistently gestures in the direction of one colleague, it could mean they value that person’s opinion or expect them to support the point being made.

This doesn’t just happen in professional settings. At a family dinner, a teenager telling a funny story might unconsciously point or glance toward their sibling, signaling that they share an inside joke. In social groups, observing who gestures toward whom can give you insight into hidden alliances, friendships, or even tensions.

13. Fidgeting

Fidgeting—tapping feet, drumming fingers, playing with jewelry—often comes from restlessness, stress, or boredom. Someone waiting for a long-delayed appointment might bounce their knee without even realizing it, while a student in class might spin a pen around their fingers when they’re tuned out of the lecture. On the other hand, a person sitting still, with relaxed posture and hands resting calmly, is likely feeling comfortable and at ease.

It’s important not to overinterpret fidgeting as deception. While some people associate it with lying, there are many benign reasons. In fact, individuals with ADHD or autism often fidget as a way of self-regulation—it helps them stay focused or calm. For them, increased fidgeting could simply mean the environment is overstimulating or that they need a short break.

14. Self-touching

Touching oneself—whether rubbing the neck, clasping hands together, or folding arms—often has a soothing effect. It can be a sign of self-comfort when someone feels nervous, shy, or stressed. For instance, someone giving a public speech might unconsciously clasp their hands together at their chest as if bracing themselves. Another common example is rubbing the back of the neck during an awkward silence, which can signal discomfort or uncertainty.

But self-touch isn’t always about anxiety. Sometimes it’s about flirting—like lightly playing with hair or touching the collarbone while speaking. It can also simply mean someone is tired, trying to stay alert, or even just getting cozy. As always, context and accompanying cues are key.

15. Timing of hand gestures

The timing of gestures tells you a lot about sincerity. When someone speaks naturally, their hand movements usually flow with their words—they gesture as they talk, emphasizing points in real time. A friend excitedly telling you about their weekend might wave their hands around, with the movements syncing perfectly with their story.

But when gestures come after the words—like someone speaking first, then adding a gesture as an afterthought—it can be a subtle sign of fabrication. The delay happens because the person is mentally constructing their story, and the body language doesn’t line up as smoothly.

Imagine a coworker explaining why they were late: if they say, “Traffic was awful,” and only afterward gesture toward the road, it might be worth noting the mismatch. Of course, not every delayed gesture means lying—some people are simply less coordinated in how they express themselves.

16. Tall posture

The way a person carries themselves can instantly shape how others perceive them. Standing tall with shoulders back and chest open is often associated with confidence, authority, and self-assurance. Leaders and people comfortable in their own skin naturally project this kind of presence. When someone enters a room upright and poised, they don’t even need to speak before others sense their confidence.

Slouching, on the other hand, tends to send the opposite signal. A hunched back or rounded shoulders can indicate insecurity, fatigue, or a lack of interest. Picture a student giving a presentation—if they stand tall, they look prepared and in control. If they shrink into themselves, the audience may interpret it as nervousness or lack of conviction, even if the content is solid.

17. Mirrored body language

Mirroring is one of those subtle yet powerful signs of connection. When two people are comfortable with each other, their bodies often fall into sync without them even realizing it. If you cross your legs during a coffee chat and your friend does the same shortly after, that’s mirroring in action. It shows rapport, empathy, and sometimes even attraction.

This phenomenon happens in professional settings, too. A job candidate who mirrors the interviewer’s posture might be signaling eagerness to connect, while an interviewer who mirrors the candidate could be trying to put them at ease. Noticing when someone is mirroring you can help you gauge whether a relationship—personal or professional—is on a positive track.

18. Open posture

Open posture is all about expansiveness. People who feel comfortable and confident often spread out, whether by placing their arms on the backs of chairs, sitting with legs uncrossed, or using broad gestures. Think of a sports champion raising both arms in triumph—this is the ultimate display of dominance and celebration.

But open posture isn’t limited to victory moments. In everyday life, a manager who sits at a meeting with open arms and an uncluttered desk may seem more approachable than one who hunches behind crossed arms and a laptop screen. Likewise, someone on a date who relaxes into their chair with open body language is probably feeling at ease in the interaction.

19. Leaning and turning

The way someone angles their body can tell you a lot about their interest level. Leaning in signals engagement, curiosity, or attraction. For instance, when two friends are deep in conversation, they often lean across the table toward each other, signaling they’re invested in the exchange.

Turning or leaning away, however, can signal disinterest or discomfort. Maybe a colleague shifts slightly away during a meeting because they disagree with what’s being said. Or on a first date, if someone consistently angles their body toward the door, it could mean they’re eager for an exit. That said, sometimes the reason is more neutral—they may just feel tired, distracted, or even overwhelmed by the environment. Repeated patterns matter more than a single instance.

20. Proximity

How close people choose to stand or sit is one of the clearest indicators of how they feel toward each other. Friends and couples often reduce physical distance naturally, even in crowded spaces. If someone consistently sits beside you instead of across from you, or inches closer during a conversation, it’s often a sign of trust, comfort, or affection.

On the flip side, if someone backs up when you approach or keeps extra space between you, it may mean they want more boundaries—whether physical, emotional, or social. Proximity can also be a window into other people’s relationships. Two coworkers who always huddle close while whispering in the office likely share a strong bond, while someone who keeps noticeable distance during team lunches might prefer to keep things more professional.

Summary

Reading body language is about paying attention to subtle, often unconscious cues that reveal how someone feels or what they’re thinking. While no single gesture tells the whole story, clusters of behaviors can give strong hints.

  • Posture: Standing tall with shoulders back projects confidence, while slouching can suggest insecurity or fatigue. Open posture (arms and legs relaxed, gestures wide) signals comfort and dominance, while closed posture (arms and legs crossed) often shows defensiveness or unease.
  • Eye behavior: Balanced eye contact usually means interest and engagement. Too much can feel forced—sometimes linked to lying or social anxiety—while too little may signal shyness, discomfort, or cultural differences. Eye direction can also reveal focus: looking at you shows attention, glancing at the door or clock shows distraction.
  • Facial expressions: Raised eyebrows can mean surprise, worry, or curiosity, while crow’s feet around the eyes reveal a genuine smile. A clenched jaw or furrowed brow often points to stress. Grimacing—tightening the mouth—is a microexpression of discomfort or unease.
  • Gestures and hands: Timing matters—truthful people gesture naturally as they speak, while liars may add movements afterward. Pointing or gesturing toward someone can signal trust or alliance. Self-touching (rubbing the neck, crossing arms, touching hair) often means seeking comfort, though it can also be flirtatious.
  • Movement and fidgeting: Fidgeting may show nervousness, restlessness, or boredom, but it can also be a self-regulation tool for people with ADHD or autism. Leaning in typically means engagement or interest, while leaning away suggests disconnection or discomfort.
  • Mirroring: When someone unconsciously copies your posture or movements, it’s a strong sign of rapport, empathy, or attraction.
  • Proximity: People move closer when they feel trust or affection and back away when they need space or feel uncomfortable. Watching how much distance people keep between themselves and others can reveal the nature of their relationship.

The key to reading body language is not to overinterpret single signals but to observe patterns, consider context, and, when in doubt, ask directly.

Przemkas Mosky
Przemkas Mosky started Perfect 24 Hours in 2017. He is a Personal Productivity Specialist, blogger and entrepreneur. He also works as a coach assisting people to increase their motivation, social skills or leadership abilities. Read more here