If you want to know how to cope with separation from your spouse, you’ll love this article.
All kinds of study trips, “for bread” or “for the adventure of life” are always tempting and it is worth using them if there is a chance to implement them, but very often they involve leaving the partner and separating with him for some time. Comfortably, if the partner can accompany us, but it is not always possible. Then the dilemma of what to choose: a career or love? It is worth knowing that separation does not necessarily mean the end of a relationship. Below you can find some tips on how to make everything connect perfectly.
How To Cope With Separation From Your Spouse?
1. Before you leave, assure your partner about your loyalty to him
Promise that you will be waiting for him, let him feel special for you. In this situation, the preparation for the trip, which in itself causes a lot of stress, will become less burdensome if you are aware that the other person will wait patiently.
2. Before leaving, organize a romantic evening so that the other person can become convinced that he is someone special to you.
Ensure your love and attachment, do not be afraid to make plans for the future, i.e. what you will do, how your partner will come back, for example where you go on vacation, etc. You probably do not realize it, but it strongly strengthens the feeling of bonding in relationship, and it is very important in such circumstances.
3. Determine what you will allow each other, ie, set out certain limits that you later do not dare to cross.
Thanks to earlier conversations on this subject, there will be no further clashes, for example in the context of going out to parties, meeting new people, going abroad, etc.
4. Also, determine how you will contact.
Choose a time of day that suits both of you. This is especially important in the case of a trip to a country with a completely different time zone, that is when, for example, in Poland there is a night, and in another place it is noon. You have to take into account your schedule of work / activities at the university / school or other interests. The person leaving should also determine more or less what she would like to do on the spot, so that there would be no later claims from her partner that his beloved “emigrant” has no time at all and deliberately looks for a job to avoid contact him.
5. Arm yourself with patience and try to imagine that you are in the place of your partner.
Then you would not try to use up to the time you are going to spend away or would you act differently than the partner to whom you have any grievances that you do not devote enough time to you. It is known that every trip gives many opportunities that a stay in your country does not offer. So let’s try to put yourself in the place of the other person.
6. Make sure your contacts are regular.
Do not drag conversations by force so as not to fall into the routine. Let your conversations be even short, but quite frequent and not boring, let them not become an unpleasant necessity that each of you will only want to “whack” as a common ritual. During your contacts, try to talk about everything that happens in your life, to be up to date, that one day you will not find that you have no common themes, you have separate worlds and nothing really connects you. For this reason, to avoid it, exchange experiences and impressions from each day, week, talk about new friends, classes, interests. All this not only strengthens the relationship, but also allows you to get to know your partner better and confirms the conviction that his trip has a really deep meaning,
7. Support your partner in all his activities.
Do not think that it is only you that is hard for you, because you too. He is in a completely new place where he does not know anyone and is really alone. Therefore, give him the feeling that he has full support in you, give him advice if possible and let him cry when necessary. It is very important that you never get the impression that you are jealous (in the wrong sense) and that you are envious.
8. If possible (time, financial and other) try to visit your partner in his new place of residence.
Thanks to this, you will get to know his realities of life, the company in which he turns, and thanks to that you will calm down that nothing bad is threatening him, that everything is in the best order. Ideally, if your arrival was a surprise for your partner, but here it is worth to be in touch with someone / tenant to control whether your loved one has planned something else for this time.
Do not show that you are dying of longing that your life has lost its meaning. During this time, also find some additional activities – maybe, for example, the language course of the country in which your partner found himself – so that when you visit him, you will shine your knowledge of that language? There are plenty of possibilities. If you want to visit your partner and make him a surprise, be sure to keep in touch with anyone around you, be constantly up to date, or even just do not kiss the door handle when you come there. You need to know if your loved one has any other plans at this time. Provide a partner about your love, but never blame him for your mental state, never give him the feeling that his trip is meaningless, and is only the reason for your worries and personal suffering.