How To Convince Someone To Give You Something: 13 Tips

Want to know how to convince someone to give you something? Then you’re in the right place.

At times, we may require something from others – be it borrowing a treasured item from a friend or convincing an investor to invest a large sum of money. To increase your chances of success, it is crucial to plan and prepare yourself before asking. You should come across as confident, organized, and trustworthy.

Additionally, it is beneficial to strengthen your relationship with the person you are requesting from. When you establish a sense of trust, it enhances your chances of receiving what you desire from them.

How To Convince Someone To Give You Something:

1. Timing is critical when working with others.

Approaching someone when they are in a negative mood can result in dismissive and uncooperative behavior. Therefore, it’s essential to wait for the right moment to discuss important matters. Ideally, you want to catch the person when they are in a positive mood and more willing to listen to what you have to say.

Moreover, catching someone when they are tired can increase the likelihood of them agreeing with you. When people are fatigued, their ability to evaluate a request thoroughly may be hindered, making them more receptive to agreeing without much deliberation.

For instance, if you’re seeking a promotion and want to discuss it with your boss, you should choose the right time. Avoid approaching them as soon as they arrive on a busy Monday morning. Instead, select a moment when they are relaxed and open to a discussion.

2. Providing context and background information is helpful when making a request.

It enables the person to understand your needs and the reasons behind them, indicating that you have put thought into the request and value their input.

For instance, suppose you ask your sister to lend you some money for gas. In that case, you can provide some context by explaining how you overspent last weekend and are working on budgeting better. Additionally, offering to do some errands in return demonstrates that you appreciate their help and are willing to reciprocate.

By providing this information, you show that you are responsible and proactive in addressing the situation, rather than simply asking for assistance without consideration or planning.

3. Making a polite request is crucial as being too forceful or demanding can lead to hesitation or reluctance from the other person.

People don’t want to feel like they are being coerced into doing something, so it’s essential to show respect and courtesy. Using polite words like ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ can make a significant difference.

For instance, when asking for an extra ticket to a concert, you could say something like “May I please have your extra ticket to the concert tonight? I really love that band, and it would be great to hang out with you.”

This approach demonstrates that you are appreciative of their assistance, and it makes them feel valued and respected. By adopting a polite tone, you can convey a sense of consideration and empathy, which can increase the chances of your request being fulfilled.

4. Being specific in your request is important because vague requests are less likely to be fulfilled.

When a request lacks clarity, it becomes difficult for the other person to understand exactly what you want. Even if they have the intention to help you, they may struggle to determine the appropriate course of action. Therefore, it is essential to provide clear instructions on what you need.

For instance, when discussing a promotion with your boss (1), instead of asking a general and uncertain question like “Do you think I’ll ever get some kind of promotion?”, it is more effective to be specific and direct. You could ask, “How soon will I be promoted to Assistant Vice President?”

This precise inquiry communicates your clear aspirations and allows your boss to provide a specific and informed response. By being specific in your requests, you facilitate better understanding and increase the likelihood of receiving the desired outcome.

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5. It is essential to have patience when making a request for two reasons.

Firstly, the person may eventually fulfill your request, and secondly, you may need their assistance in the future. If someone initially declines your request, it is crucial not to get upset or angry.

Instead, it would be best to give them some time to reflect on your request. For instance, if your neighbor refuses your request to build a fence on your shared property line, it is essential to remain patient and give them time to consider your proposal.

Having patience demonstrates that you are respectful and understanding, even when the other person is unable to accommodate your request. Moreover, it allows you to maintain a positive relationship with the person, which can be beneficial in the future when you need their assistance.

6. Appearing trustworthy is crucial when making a request because if the other person does not trust you, they may be hesitant to fulfill your request.

To earn someone’s trust, it is essential to be honest and upfront about your intentions. For instance, if you want your mom to loan you her car, it is vital to demonstrate that you are trustworthy.

This could be achieved by following rules, making good grades, and completing household chores. By demonstrating your responsibility and reliability, your mom is more likely to trust you with her car.

Trust is built over time and requires consistency in behavior. By consistently acting in a trustworthy manner, you can strengthen your relationship with the person and increase the likelihood of them fulfilling your requests in the future.

7. Understanding and meeting the needs of others is a key factor in building a strong relationship and increasing the likelihood of them fulfilling your requests.

People are often self-serving, so if they believe that you can help them in some way, they may be more willing to assist you in return. One effective way to meet someone’s needs is to offer your help and support when they need it.

This could involve assisting them with a task, teaching them a new skill, or simply being there to listen when they need someone to talk to. By fostering the relationship in this way, you are more likely to gain their trust and willingness to help you in return.

For example, if you want to borrow your roommate’s favorite sweater, you could offer to take her turn cleaning the bathroom. By meeting her needs, you demonstrate that you value the relationship and are willing to make an effort to help her out. This can strengthen the relationship and make her more likely to lend you the sweater in the future.

8. To increase the chances of getting what you want, it’s essential to highlight the benefits for the other person.

Instead of emphasizing what they will be giving up, focus on what they will gain from the situation. For instance, if you want your dad to help you buy a car, you could tell him that he can rely on you to run errands for him on the weekends if you have your own vehicle.

SEE ALSO: How To Practice Radical Honesty: 12-Step Guide

9. To increase your chances of getting what you want, it helps to build a closer relationship with the person you’re making the request from.

Spend some time getting to know them better so you can understand how to communicate with them and earn their trust. For instance, if you want to ask a favor from a colleague, try to find common ground and make a connection with them. If you see a photo of their pet on their desk, strike up a conversation about your own furry friend.

10. If you have a good relationship with someone but feel disconnected, try to spend quality time together.

Doing so can make them feel appreciated and valued. Invite them to lunch and show interest in their life by actively listening and asking questions.

11. It is important to remain calm and composed when making a request.

If you appear too stressed or anxious, it can make the other person hesitant to fulfill your request. Taking a few deep breaths and giving yourself a positive pep talk can help you feel more confident and relaxed. For instance, you could say to yourself, “I’m worthy of a promotion, and I’m going to communicate my request in a confident and respectful manner.”

12. Before making a request, it’s important to prepare yourself by organizing your thoughts.

You can create a list of what you need or want, along with reasons for the request and potential benefits for both parties. If you’re worried about forgetting something important, jot down some notes to refer to during the conversation. This will help you stay focused and make your case more effectively.

13. To make a clear request, it is important to avoid filler words like “uhm” and “well,” as they make you appear less confident and your request less concise.

It is best to speak clearly and say what you want in the clearest way possible. For instance, instead of saying, “Well, uhm, I was wondering if it’s possible for you to maybe lend me your bike,” you can say “Can I borrow your bike?”

In summary, to convince someone to give you something, it is important to approach them politely and respectfully, using words like “please” and “thank you.” You should also be specific in your request, rather than making vague or ambiguous statements.

Building a trusting relationship with the person is essential, which may involve spending time with them and getting to know them better. To increase the chances of success, you can focus on the other person’s gains and needs, and also be prepared, speak clearly, and remain calm and relaxed during the conversation.

Thank you for reading this article about how to convince someone to give you something and I really hope that you take action my advice.

I wish you good luck and I hope its contents have been a good help to you.

Przemkas Mosky
Przemkas Mosky started Perfect 24 Hours in 2017. He is a Personal Productivity Specialist, blogger and entrepreneur. He also works as a coach assisting people to increase their motivation, social skills or leadership abilities. Read more here