Today you’re going to learn how to deal with fake people.
Is someone in your life suddenly acting in a way that feels off, like they’re putting on a mask you know isn’t really them? Or maybe you’ve been dealing with someone who seems more interested in showing off than in being genuine, and it’s starting to wear on you. You’re not alone—fake people are everywhere, and they often thrive on attention. The good news is, there are practical ways to deal with them so their behavior doesn’t control your mood or your day.
How To Deal With Fake People:
1. Limit your exposure to fake people.
The simplest and often most effective approach is to minimize how much time you spend with them. If someone consistently makes you feel drained, irritated, or disrespected, you don’t owe them your company. Spend your time with people who uplift you.
For example, instead of sitting next to the fake coworker in the break room who always brags about their life, take your coffee outside or join someone you actually enjoy talking to. The less space you give them in your life, the less power they have over you.
2. Keep things short and polite when you can’t avoid them.
Sometimes you don’t have a choice—you’ll end up in the same room, the same group chat, or the same family gathering as the person who rubs you the wrong way. In these situations, don’t overthink it. You don’t need to go out of your way to engage. Be civil, say hello if necessary, and then focus on others around you.
Think of it like making small talk with a stranger in line at the grocery store: polite, but nothing personal. That way, you protect your own peace without starting unnecessary drama.
3. Don’t let their behavior get under your skin.
One of the hardest parts about dealing with fake people is not reacting to their nonsense. Maybe they make a backhanded compliment or exaggerate a story to look impressive—it’s tempting to roll your eyes or snap back. Instead, remind yourself that their behavior says more about them than it does about you.
If you feel your temper flaring, excuse yourself for a moment. Go grab some water, check your phone, or take a deep breath. And if they cross the line with something disrespectful, calmly set a boundary with a clear statement like, “I don’t appreciate that kind of comment.” You don’t need to argue—just make it known that you’re not a doormat.
4. Stay true to yourself.
When someone is fake, it can be tempting to beat them at their own game—spreading gossip, throwing shade, or mocking them behind their back. But doing that only drags you down to their level. People watching from the outside might not even be able to tell who’s fake and who’s real.
Instead, let your authenticity stand out. If they gossip, don’t join in. If they boast, you don’t have to compete. Staying grounded and genuine is the best way to show that you’re different.
5. Have the tough conversation if it’s someone close to you.
It’s one thing when an acquaintance or coworker is fake—you can usually sidestep them. But if it’s a close friend or family member, ignoring it might not work. If you notice someone you care about changing in a way that feels forced or unhealthy, say something. Maybe your best friend suddenly starts acting like a completely different person just to fit in with a new crowd.
You could say, “Hey, I feel like you’re not yourself lately. Is everything okay?” You don’t have to accuse them, but you can point out the change and remind them of who they really are. They may not love hearing it in the moment, but deep down, honesty from someone who cares can make a real impact.
6. Ask gentle questions to understand what’s really going on
Sometimes fake behavior is a cover for something deeper—maybe insecurity, stress, or even wanting to fit in with a new group. If the person is someone you care about, try to dig a little without making them feel attacked. Keep your tone curious rather than judgmental.
For example, instead of saying, “Why are you acting so fake lately?” you could ask, “I’ve noticed you’ve been talking differently around certain people—what’s that about?” or “You seem a bit different these days, is everything okay?” These kinds of questions open the door for an honest conversation instead of making the person defensive. A lot of people put on a mask when they feel they’re not good enough as themselves—sometimes they just need a reminder that they are.
7. Have an honest conversation if it feels serious
If your friend’s behavior is leading them down a harmful path, staying silent isn’t being supportive—it’s letting them drift further away. A real friend isn’t afraid to speak up when something feels wrong. Say you notice a friend pretending to like drinking just to keep up with a new crowd, even though you know it’s not them.
That’s when you step in and say, “I don’t think you’re doing this for you—I think you’re doing it because of them, and I’m worried about where it’s going.” They may brush you off or get defensive, but planting that seed might make them rethink later. If the situation involves something dangerous—like drugs, reckless behavior, or toxic influences—you may need to involve someone older or more responsible, even if it risks upsetting your friend. Looking out for their safety matters more than keeping the peace.
8. Share your perspective with mutual friends
You don’t have to carry the weight of dealing with a fake friend on your own. Chances are, if you’ve noticed the change, others have too. Talk about it with people you trust, but keep the conversation respectful. Instead of turning it into a gossip session, focus on figuring out why your friend is acting differently and what the group can do to handle it.
For example, if a friend suddenly becomes obsessed with impressing strangers online, your group could decide to encourage more “real” hangouts that aren’t about showing off—like movie nights or hiking trips. Mutual friends can provide valuable insights, and sometimes, hearing the same concern from more than one person helps the fake friend realize something’s off.
9. Don’t be afraid to step back from the friendship
At the end of the day, you can’t force someone to drop their act. If they want to keep being fake, that’s their choice—but you don’t have to stick around for it. Sometimes the healthiest move is to distance yourself. That might mean not spending as much one-on-one time together or letting the friendship cool down naturally.
This space sends a clear message: if being fake is their new normal, you’re not interested in playing along. And even if they don’t change, you’ll protect your own peace by limiting the stress they bring into your life. Friendships, like any relationship, should feel balanced and authentic. If you’re always left feeling drained, it’s a sign to reevaluate how much energy you want to keep giving.
Summary
To deal with fake people, the key is protecting your own peace while staying authentic. Limit your exposure to them as much as possible, and when you can’t avoid them, keep interactions short, polite, and distant—like small talk with a stranger. Don’t let their behavior get under your skin; if they push boundaries, calmly set limits without blowing up. Never stoop to their level with gossip or petty remarks—your authenticity is your strength.
If the fake person is a close friend, pay attention to sudden changes and try to understand what’s behind their behavior. Ask respectful questions to open up a conversation, and if it feels serious, have a heart-to-heart to let them know how their choices affect them and you. When safety is at risk, don’t hesitate to involve someone responsible, even if it upsets them. Talk with mutual friends to share perspectives and find healthy ways to respond together, but avoid turning it into a gossip session.
Finally, remember you can’t control anyone else’s behavior. If the fakeness doesn’t stop, take a step back from the friendship. Distance shows that you value authenticity and sets clear boundaries about what you’re willing to accept.
